One of the greatest challenges of relationships is maintaining one's individual needs and interests while staying connected as a couple. Maintaining a healthy partnership requires an extraordinary balancing act. At times, the relationship may feel off-kilter — perhaps you are feeling angry, defensive, or disconnected, or you’re having the same argument repeatedly without getting anywhere. Often, what is said by one partner is heard quite differently by the other. Defenses arise when we feel hurt.

An important part of my role is to create safety and structure for more productive conversations that lead to lasting improvements in the relationship. In order to foster this safety, it’s essential that I build trust with each partner. I believe that the process of couples therapy is as important as the content of the conversations. The process creates a space to build skills in communicating what is difficult to express and also to learn how to truly hear what one’s partner is conveying. If both partners are willing to be patient, vulnerable, and open during therapy, they can gain significant benefits, such as improved communication, increased intimacy, and a deeper understanding of one’s partner and oneself.